The Whole Truth And Nothing But The Truth

As some of you may recall, Hazel, David's sister, kindly answered a variety of interview questions for "The Purple Flower Gang" in August, 1990. Word has it that Hazel's husband, Ken, is currently internationally reknown as the most sought after individual for interviews. In a conscious effort to keep "Monkee Shines" from becoming a "boring" newsletter, we have appealed to Ken to answer the following questions. With a modest British sense of "humour", we proudly present..."The Whole Truth And Nothing But The Truth". (For the record, Hazel indicated she is not so sure about that!)

When, where, and how did you meet Hazel?
I met Hazel in 1950 when I moved from Liverpool (Oooo! Did you know The Beatles?) to Manchester and then attended the same church. She set out to trap me from that date and eventually wore me down until we married in 1959.

What did you think about David's talent and/or potential the first time you saw him perform in a play or at a concert?
I saw Dave in several church pantomimes - a rotten little kid with his gang (Do you mean "The Purple Flower Gang"?) of rotten little urchins who kept getting in my way - his main talent was turning up where I didn't want him!

Did you see David on Coronation Street, in Oliver!, or at The Monkees' 1967 Wembley concerts?
I borrowed a car (That's what they all say!) to take Dave for his appearance on Coronation Street, he spent his time "chatting up" one of the young girls in the series, and trying to get rid of me - I stuck with it 'cause revenge is sweet! I didn't see Oliver!. I was working all of this time, but I did go to stay with Dave and the other Monkees for the Wembly (British spelling) concerts. I shared a hotel room with Dave so I know he behaved himself but I can't vouch for the others.

If you did see The Monkees in the 1960's, what would you say the biggest difference between the shows then and now would be (aside from the equipment)?
None of the guys (nor their entourage) could move outside the hotel without a riot - at least in the '80's they were able to have a private life away from the hotel/concert venues - apart from that I never really saw their equipment in the '60's so what can I say? (Ken, just smile and say, "Cheese!")

Was it true there was a steady stream of girls "hangin' round" your house in the 1960's?
It's true and might I say Dave was always jealous about this ("It's so important to have jealous friends.") I believe he got the "knack" later on in his life!

Was it difficult for David to have a "normal" relationship with Deborah and Robert when he came to visit?
Dave was always "Uncle David" to the kids and still is although at their ages and at his age, it doesn't always sound right.

Was David able to relax and just be himself when he came home to visit?
No, it got difficult to go home and then he came to us, and then that got difficult and we weren't able to see him for a while. It's easier now - "David who?"

How did you manage to become David's private bouncer on the road during The Monkees' and David's recent tours?
I thought I was going on holiday then three days before the English tour Dave and Laurie Haley came to our house, and he said, "By the way I've mentioned you to the other guys, and they think you should come along as security!" (It's a tough job, but somebody has to do it.)

What did you enjoy the most and least about traveling on the road with David?
The best bit is the travel and seeing all the different places. The worst bit is the travel and only seeing the hotels in the different places. It's quite frightening to only know where you are by looking at a list and checking the date. (Road burn)

What are some of your favorite stories about being on the road with David?
I love Mickey (British spelling) using a computor (British spelling) to plan his routes to various towns especially when he set off for Newcastle upon Tyne (only an hour late and luckily there was an opening act.) I liked Dave falling off the stage in Carlisle and still having his 'mike' switched on. (Ken, did you pull the wings off flies when you were a kid?) Don't tell him I said that. He really did hurt himself.

What is the biggest difference in David now as opposed to then?
David still gets up (No comment!) as early as he always did - but now he doesn't wake up until noon. Just try talking to him at breakfast.

Since you have retired and find time to lounge about the house whilst wife Hazel slaves to support you in a manner in which you have grown accustomed, what interests/hobbies have you developed? (Remember, this is a family newsletter!)
I paint and do a little sculpture and answer questionaires (British spelling) from maniacs. (But that doesn't make us bad people! Someone once said the mentally ill oftentimes act quite normal.)

Keeping in mind your police observatory skills, when you have accompanied David on the road, has it been easy for you to tell a true fan from one who has ulterior motives?
I can always tell a true fan, they have glazed eyes, never speak, always look at David when you talk to them and deliver photograph albums that just have photos of David in them and nobody else. The ones with the "motive" pay far too much attention to me and still don't include photos of anyone but David in the photograph albums.

What in your opinion constitutes a true fan?
The one who says, "So! He trod on my foot as he pushed past! - I'll get my shoe bronzed." (Does that mean kind of like being spit on from the stage when David sang "No Time" in Lake Tahoe? Well, why didn't he say that?)

In the nicest possible way, what do you think fans want from David?
Most fans want time from David (We agree.), which is just the one thing he can't give to everyone - Fifty fans want five minutes conversation - not unreasonable, five minutes, is it - adds up to over four hours! {Is this a word problem? 50 fans x 5 minutes = 250 minutes divided by 60 minutes = 4 hours and 10 minutes. Good looking and a mathematical scholar, too!)

How do you think most fans behave?
On the whole they behave very well and their 'minders' aren't too bad, either. Those under police escort are sometimes difficult. (Does ex-police escort count?)

Again, keeping in mind this is a family newsletter, what kinds of fans do you think David enjoys meeting most?
David most likes those fans who don't push into the dressing room after a show just as he gets out of the shower. He also likes those fans who don't try to break his neck to show him they love him.

What do you think David considers to be a true fan?
He considers me to be a true fan, but, then, he never was a good judge!

Ken had been advised he had the right to remain silent and anything he said can and would be used against him in "Monkee Shines". Therefore, "The Purple Flower Gang" wishes to include the following disclaimer statements in both American and British translations, respectively.
"I want to make it quite clear that I deny ever having written any of the above - it's all an obvious forgery and in any case the answers were obtained by undue pressure, probably by the illicit use of truth drugs and undeniably blackmail into the bargain. I never said it, I wouldn't say it, and if you don't print it, I will sue." Ken Wilkinson (Ken's handwritten statement followed in the original newsletter.)

Thank you again, Ken. You're a great sport. You're free on parole.

Robert and Ken on tour with David in 1993